Trying something different

I could rant yet again about Sandy, but I'm sure you are tired of hearing me rag on the kid and have made your own opinions about my parenting abilities. But I will say this, Mike & I are trying something new. With a help of a friend (and you know who you are) we realized that we can't make Sandy do her homework or hand it in. We extended her bedtime and told her that we were no longer going to argue with her about doing her homework. She knows what needs to be done and when it needs to be turned in. We will help her if she needs it, all she has to do is ask. But beyond that, she is on her own. We are done with the fights and snotty attitudes. We have told her that she has to get passing grades in three of her four classes and that if she fails any of them she will either have to take summer school (if the school even offers those classes during the summer) or she will have to repeat her freshman year. We don't know yet if the Air Force has minimum requirements grade wise to get in or if she fails any grade how that will effect her ability to get into the Air Force If she ends up taking summer school then she will be missing out on some time with her sisters and the fun things we will do with them. She won't be entirely left out but I won't sit at home with Tara and Elisa while Sandy is in summer school. The kid has to learn the hard way on her own.

Bad day for Sandy

Sandy had herself a bad day all the way around starting with breakfast and not ending until well after dinner. I guess she got difficult with Mike this morning. We had fixed sausage scrambled eggs with hash browns. Mike asked if she wanted bread and she said no. Then I guess she changed her mind and wanted bread after all, so Mike said she could have butter bread. Then she decides that she wants peanut butter and Mike reluctantly agreed, more to shut her up then anything else. Well I guess she tried to spread it with a spoon and that just set Mike off, which in turn set Sandy off. She also was dawdling to where Mike had to boot her out the door for school. I don't know what kind of a day she had at school, but she almost got reamed by us when she was almost 15 min late getting home from school. Mike and I were certain she had taken off as she was mad at Mike when she walked out the door before school. As it turned out her bus was running late so she didn't even know that we were about to chew her a new one for making us worry. She has been know to take off, not be where she said she was going to be, stop at a friends house or stop to play with a young animal. So we are justified when she is late thinking that she is pulling something. We asked her if she had any homework and she said a little that wouldn't take her but a few minutes to do. During dinner she announced that some boy at school was going to cut her a CD. We told her we wanted to listen to it first as she admitted that she did not know what this boy was cutting for her. That started a battle in and of its self. By the time we were done with dinner it was 7:45 and her normal bedtime is 8:30. I asked her about her homework and she said all she had to do was Algebra which she needed help to do. I talked to Mike and we agreed that she wouldn't have to do her chores and could stay up until 9:00 to try to get something done on her homework. When she said she would need help from her Algebra teacher to get her homework done I told her that her bedtime was back to 8:30 and low and behold she has World Geography to do. It had just "popped" into her head as she and I were talking. Well I blew up and I told Mike that he needed to deal with her as I was not in the right frame of mind to do so. That started yet another argument that led to a lecture that went in one ear and out the other. I don't know what her problem was but she best be in a better mood when she gets home from school or we all will butt heads yet again. Both Mike and I are sick and tired of her crappy attitude.

General update

This is the latest from the Bacon household. Sandy went back to school today. Yeah! She claims to have gotten caught up from the three days she missed. We shall see soon enough. The teachers post the student's grades on-line, so we can see for ourselves. As Mike stated Sandy got caught with her Ipod. She admitted that she did think we would find out and was just being stupid. I applaud her honesty if nothing else. We haven't decided what her punishment will be yet, but it will be a good one.

Mike's back was feeling a little better so he tried to help me out by doing some of the cooking. Now his back is messed up again. We just can't seem to win with that. The only thing I can think of doing is taking over again, he relaxes and I sleep in while he gets up with Sandy in the morning. That seems to work for the most part. I almost wonder if walking on his back would do any good. Knowing my luck I would break his back and then I would feel like a shit. We need to hire a masseuse to give him back rubs and me back and hip massages. If only! It would also be nice to get a hot tub. Ah some day.

The Missouri courts have ruled that my court date will have to be rescheduled. The GAL couldn't be bothered to show up. As far as she was concerned the case should be thrown out because we didn't pay her $1000 fee. Her excuse was that she didn't want to make the trip into Fulton if she wasn't going to get paid. So now she will have to make a trip out when the judge reschedules the court date. So I still have a chance to get this thing investigated. And if I feel she isn't doing a good enough job I will request that the courts censure her and ask for a different GAL. Brian just may give in just to get me to leave him alone. Yeah, as if. But a woman can dream alittle.

Free to good home, one 15 yr old daughter

I just amazes me, and it shouldn't, just how much Sandy thinks she can get away with. The past two days we have been battling with her to brush her teeth. Last night she went to bed around 8:30 pm and went straight to bed without brushing her teeth. I went into our bathroom at the same time she did went into hers and when I came out a minute later she was already in bed. I asked her if she had brushed her teeth and she said yes. I replied with "What, in two seconds?" And she came back with yes, in one second. I told her that one second brushing is definitely not brushing one's teeth and she needed to redo this task. She came stomping out and ten seconds later closed her bedroom door. So this evening she went to bed and I suspected that yet again she had not brushed her teeth, so I went into her bathroom and looked high and low and could not find her toothbrush. I have no idea what she did with it or how long she has been without a toothbrush. We will have to soak one of our old toothbrushes in peroxide so she has a toothbrush seeing as we don't have the funds to get her a new one. And even if we did have the funds to get her a new toothbrush I wouldn't buy her one because she is still sick. I would normally wait a few more days and was sure she had thrown the cold off before I would buy her a new toothbrush. SO not only do we have to check to be sure she takes her pills morning and night I will have to stand there and make sure she washes her hands and brushes her teeth. Just what I want to do with my morning and evening, police a 15 yr old who is acting like a two year old.

Sick kid

Sandy has gotten herself a head cold and has been out of school since Wednesday. She has been coughing and sniffling and feeling sorry for herself. We have been keeping her confined to her room. She has been taking this personally, like we are punishing her or something. We keep telling her that neither one of us can afford to get sick. Me especially with my suppressed immune system. But that just garners tears of pity. We contacted her teachers and she will be getting her homework so that she doesn't get too far behind. What I am not sure about is that she was in the middle of taking the standardized tests when she got sick. So I hope that this doesn't affect her grades too badly. She will have her work cut out for her this weekend trying to get caught up in her school work. I suppose you think that I sound cold. In some respects I do. I am very angry with her right now. She has taken an Ipod that we had taken from her because her grades slipped. She has so little regard or respect for Mike & I and I just don't know what to do with her anymore. She is not being treated horribly, tho she would say otherwise, but she is not getting any "perks" that would be afforded to her if she hadn't taken the Ipod. I will be glad when she gets back to school, but her spring break will be coming up soon. That ought to be fun!

Clepto Kid

We have been having a problem lately with Sandy. She has been getting up in the middle of the night and eating any candy that we may have in the refrigerator. We had caught her stealing some Tootsie Rolls, we found the wrappers in her bedroom. We have a rule about no food in the bedrooms. She was caught red handed and had no reason why she did this. Then she got some candy from her prayer partner and I had told her that she was to ask before she ate any of it. And again she got into the candy when she was not suppose to. And now Mike and I have some chocolate chips in the refrigerator and she has been eating those also. We haven't confronted her about this yet mostly because I am not sure what her punishment will be. And if that isn't bad enough she got an Ipod for Christmas from a friend at church. I had my reservations about her having it but we told her that the charger had to stay in the living room and if her grades dropped the Ipod would be taken away, with the ability to get it back when her grades came up and if her attitude stayed good. She had it taken from her a few weeks ago due to bad grades and getting caught with candy in her room. Today I checked on the Ipod and found it gone. The charger was still there but the Ipod itself and the ear buds are missing. The only thing that could have happened to it is she has taken into her room or to school with her. We were going to confront her about it, but now we are going to wait for her to trip herself up. That Ipod won't keep a charge for very long and I have taken the charger and put it in our room. At some point she will ask where the charger is and that is when we will nail her. At that point we will either make her give it back to the friend who gave it to her with the explanation as to why she is returning it or we will give it to her sisters. It really makes me angry that we have to lock our TV, Mike has to lock his computer (which is in the living room) and any candy I don't want her to have has to be hidden in our room. It also makes us angry that she thought that we would not notice that the Ipod was missing. She keeps breaking all the rules. She has no respect for either Mike or I and our belongings. There is no reason for her to be raiding the refrigerator. She gets to eat all she wants at dinner. Mike thinks the only reason she is eating candy when she is not allowed to is because she is not allowed to. That is a blatant sign of disrespect and we are not sure what we are going to do about it.

Chili cook-off

Our church had a chili cook, proceed benefiting the youth group. Mike and I didn't make it to church today so we could attend the cook-off. No, Mike's back isn't any better, as much as he would like to think it is. This is a learning experience for the both of us. We are finding out what we will need to have prepared for when this happens again. It also made us realize that we need to have something in place in regards to Sandy if the both of us end up in the hospital at the same time. This is the wake up call we both needed.

Anyway, the chili cook-off went pretty well. Maybe 7 people made chili. One person made a chocolate chili. I know what that sounds like but it really wasn't all that bad. And after everyone had gotten their bowls of chili and hot dogs there was a dessert auction. These proceeds also go to the youth group. It was disappointing in that this turnout was smaller then last years. Last year we had a bidding war between two people for a banana pudding that went for over $125 dollars. That was fun to watch. But this year the totals didn't go above $45. Kind of a let down really. I see this youth group slowly dieing and I don't like it much. Two years ago this youth group was vibrant and outgoing. Now it's fizzled to almost nothing. I am worried that it won't be here in another two years.